MrDJ Heart's Word

我的以为

2010-03-27T22:42:00.000-07:00

你曾说不想有天让我知道
你对他,有那么好.
你说会懂我的失落,
不是靠宽容,就能够解脱.
我以为我出现的时候刚好,
你和他,就说要分开.
我以为你,已对他不再期待,
不纵容他再给你伤害
我以为我的温柔,能给你整个宇宙,
我以为我能全力填满你感情的缺口,
全心陪在你左右.弥补他一切的错,
也许我太过天真,以为奇迹会发生.
我以为终究你会慢慢明白,
他的心已不在你身上,
我的关心,你依然无动于衷,
我的以为只是我以为.
我以为我的温柔,能给你整个宇宙,
我以为我能全力填满你感情的缺口,
专心陪在你左右.弥补他一切的错,
也许我太过天真,以为奇迹会发生.
他让你红了眼眶,你却还笑着原谅,
原来你早就想好你要留在谁的身旁.
我以为我够坚强,却一天天的失望,
少给我一点希望,希望就不是奢望.
我以为我的温柔,能给你整个宇宙,
我以为我能全力填满你感情的缺口,
专心陪在你左右.弥补他一切的错,
也许我太过天真,以为奇迹会发生.
他让你红了眼眶,你却还笑着原谅,
原来你早就想好你要留在谁的身旁.
我以为我够坚强,却输的那么绝望,
少给我一点希望,希望就不是奢望.

如果

2009-11-03T07:10:00.000-08:00

如果我还一直对你微笑，你是否会先想对我说第一句话？

如果我还一直找你，你是否会愿意让我陪你一会儿？

如果我还一直在乎着你，你是否会再多看我一眼？

如果我还一直关心你，你是否会想我一瞬间？

如果我还一直对你好，你是否会喜欢我一点？

如果我还一直深愛着你，你是否会给我机会？

是否我已不看你了，你才想感觉到我害羞的模样？

是否我已不找你了，你才想要我快速不定的气息？

是否我已不再紧张你了，你才感觉到特殊的心跳？

是否我不再爱你了，你才感觉到我对你的好？

是否我已不存在了，你才感觉到我的离開？
是否我已离開了，你才感觉到我的爱？

尽管我细心灌溉，

尽管我努力心思，

你说不爱就不爱，

我一人欣赏悲哀...

因为无法对我的回报，

你的一句对不起，

足够让我为你湿了眼...

有一种爱叫做放手

林峰的放手就这样在我耳边环绕着......

特殊的心跳.....

跳着跳着.....

三拍.....

又停一拍.....

再三拍.....

又停一拍.....

似意识着想说.....

我爱你......

The Long Lost Truth

2009-09-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

Finally...
I know the truth of why did you wanna breaking up with me...
because of him...
It had started since he appeared in your life...
3 months before we broke up...
Around that time you started to change your heart slowly...
Maybe not straight away when first you two knew each other...
Maybe was after that when you had started to keep on contact with him...
And now only i know that time you actually knew the guy...

I was still thought you wanna breaking up with me...
Is because of some other reasons else...
Not to mention already since it wasn't
And i was mistaken...

Hmmm........
Maybe if i were know this truth last year...
I would felt much more hurt and sad...
Or maybe can't be accepted?
I have no idea...
But luckily i know this truth right now...
And now i think i'm okay with it...
I'm okay....

Anyway....
Wish you be happy always no matter how...
And i wish we still can be......................
hmm.......... :)

Truth is solid
As my world crumbles
You hold the truth
In your eyes

You left me in the doubtful night
The darkness enveloped me
And took my light away
Couldn't I find the way out

Help me through the darkness
Which had swallowed me
Once more
I was so lost and confused

The lies came at me
From all sides
Yet I still couldn't find the truth
No matter how hard I tried

But soon I disappeared
I was taken out
By friends, by someone
Fully appreciated

Truth isn't what you tell
Truth isn't what I listen
Truth is what I feel
Truth is what I realize.

A Little Too Not Over You

2009-07-19T06:27:00.000-07:00

Tell me whyy...
You've just so hard to forget....
I'm just so hard to stop from thinking of You...
Sometimes I try to hide...
What I feel inside My Heart...

I'm Just A Little Too Not Over You.......

YOU

You

U

the song is describing my heart......

Mile Of Day

2008-11-26T08:46:00.000-08:00

I Want To Hold Your Hands
And Walk A Mile,
Don't Want To Miss You
Even A While.

My Life Was Ever So Beautiful
Cause Of You...It's You...
MY LOVE.

Hug Me For My Worries To Die,
My Tears To Dry And My Loneliness To Fly.

It Hurts Me To Know,
How I Sometimes Can Be Little Selfish,
When It Comes To You.

I Am Getting Sentimental Over You,
For GOD Sake Explain Me Why All These.

I Miss You Every Moment Of The Day,
I Keep Me Awake Just To Listen You,
I Keep Me Empty Just For You To Fill,
I Keep Me Alive Just To See You.

My Morning Miss You,
My Evening Seeks You,
Where Were You All These Months?
Why You Weren't There To Wipe My Tears?

Fear Of Future Is Worse Than Pain Of Past,
Still I Bother The Least, Cause You Are There.

Even Second Are Too Long To Miss You,
I Want To Hold Your Hands & Walk A Mile,
Don't Want To Miss You Even A While.

Key

2008-10-27T10:28:00.001-07:00

Wishing I Could Own The Key Of Your Heart

There’s No Sense In Telling Me.

Never I Miss You.

No Matter What Other People Say.
To The Moonlight I Shall Pray.
One Day You Could Appear At My World.
And In My Heart You Are Always Be.
From Now Until Forever.
No Matter What, No Matter Where.

Memory

2008-10-27T05:52:00.000-07:00

Watching One's Colourful Love,
With The Reflected Angelic Rays,
The Moment Of You And Her,
Ever Been Coloured Happily Together,
But When The Holding Hands Is Broken,
The Beautiful Drawing Melts With Merciless,
And It's Becoming Black And White,
Just Like The Colourless Television,
The Name Of Memory Is Given,
Recalling In Our Heart Every Second.

A HourGlass

2008-10-27T05:28:00.000-07:00

In The Hourglass, I Saw You,

Reflecting Particles Of Sand,
On Your Shimmering Body,
Trapped In The Perfect Shape.

Time Had Its Needles Inserted,
Disabling Your Wings Of Fire,
From Further Flying Under Skies.

Broken Hourglass Meant No Pain,
Nothing More Than Lost Time.
Fallen Leaves That Left You Nude
In The Burned-Out Sun.

Salvation That Didn't Came,
Still Hung Up On The Telephone,
There To Receive Calls.

Still, I Think Hourglasses As Prisons,
Also Starring In Conceptual Plays.

-My Hope-

2008-09-23T10:01:00.001-07:00

Ying,
As you know, what I hope now is, you can live your current life happily. You know what I mean, you know what I hope to see from you, you know yourself. So, can't you just be like that normal? Good? Learn to live happily no matter how, learn to love every one around you including your family, learn to love yourself. Be mature-thinking, be open-minded, be civic-minded, ignore those negative influence and bad friends. You know your friends yourself, learn to say "NO" to them. Some times, care about others opinion is good too, don't being with boys so much is good to you too, although i know you are active, playful, likes exciting. Being with girls, be polite and well-behaved like a girl, be smooth mannered. Be a good daughter, listen to your father and mother, some times your father might be unreasonable and fierce, but what he is doing, never harmful to you, it's all for your own GOOD.

S-O-R-R-Y, The Truth

2008-09-23T08:15:00.000-07:00

"Sorry", is the word which I want to say to You, You, You, You, You and You Too. Just very Sorry for every thing, Sorry for making you disappointed, Sorry for making you sad, hope there's no hurt, Sorry for can't give you what you hope from me, Sorry for your patient of waiting, I know, I feel that you are treating me good, but please don't do that anymore, I'll be feel sorry for you, I'll be upset, I'm doesn't mean to you to be that good to me, I hope that you can treat me good as a friend, so am I will. I hope that you can understand in me. If you feel that I'm bad and cruel to you, just go ahead, i rather that you hate me, instead of I feel guilty myself and wasting your time. So, friends? okie?

And also my friends, my gangs, my classmate, my buddy and others. Thanks and sorry to all of you that actually I'm lying at you all. I lied to myself, my actions, my words, my face, my eye and my smile. But hope that you all will understand in me. Stupid? I know I am. I just want to apologize for you all may got some disappointment. Obviously, my hard time haven't ended yet. It's hide deeply in my heart with a carved scar that can't be seen, but can be feel. Just I'm becoming better, because of my friends, I enjoying, try to be happy everyday. So, I really appreciate you all concern, advise, time and others, especially when on my hard time before...just once again, "thanks" to all of you.

Joe, Z.Wei, J.Ping, Peter, Roy, S.Wai, Junyi...
Vivian, Lily, MayAnn...
Sorry if didn't mention you at here, cause of some reason...

+YOU+

2008-08-21T06:10:00.000-07:00

(Answer : Me)

I Wrote Your Name On My Hand,
But It Had Been Washed Away,
I Drew Your Smile On A Piece Of Paper,
But It Had Been Threw Away,
I Remember Your Look In My Mind,
But It Can Be Forgotten.
I Coloured My Love To You In The Sand,
But The Wave Whispered It Away,
I Carved You In My True Heart,
And Forever It Stay.

I May Not Get To See You As Often As I Could,
I May Not Get To Smile With You As One As I Wish,
But Through The Warmth Night...Deep In My Heart,
I Pray To GOD Under The Stars,
"Help Me Take Care Of The Girl Whom I Really Miss",
Even She's Not Mine, I Don't Mind,
Hope Her Happy Forever With Her Loved One.

It's Hard To Wait Around For,
Something That Might Never Happen,
But It's Even Harder To Give Up,
Especially When You Starting To Fill Up My Heart.

Me & -Y-

2008-08-20T10:28:00.000-07:00

Actually I wrote all the thing about us on papers. My memory from the first time i seen you, first day we been met each other, to the day the word of "break up" came out from your mouth to my ear, I am still remember all the words we been said to each other. How I feel from the day I start to keep an eye on you, were written clearly on papers. Our moment when we were together, were sweet that time, now I feel sweet too when i recall back, but sad and hurt come to me afterward.

But, you know? I had burnt all those papers into dust. No more..NO More around me..it's gone forever in the air, never will i see it again. Now I gonna to forget everything about you in my mind. Just Wipe You OFF Forever!! I might be angry when I see you...
Quite I hope that you won't appear in my sight forever.

My FIRST LOVED

2008-08-20T10:26:00.000-07:00

-THE END-

{22/09/2007-10/06/2008}

I Don't Want To Continue Let Myself Down,
Cause I Want To Stand Up As Before,
I Don't Want To Cry For You Ever Again,
Cause I Want To Keep My Tear For Happiness,
I Don't Want My World Getting Black And White,
Cause I Want To Get My Life Colour.

I Know That Is Impossible For Me,
To Forget About You From My Mind,
But You Are Just My Memory Now,
I Will Release My Fingers,
To Let Go Your Hand,
And With The Words, "Take Care!"

The Days We Met,
The Moment We Were Ever Being Together,
The Smile When We Met Each Other,
The Feeling When We Hug,
I'll Remember Forever...And...
Our Ever Sweet Love.

The Scar You Left In My Heart,
It May Will Never Gone,
The Way You Hurt Me,
I Will Never Forget,
Hoping Someone Can Wipe All These Away Miraculously,
Wishing The Good Day.

Now There Is Nothing Left From Me To You,
But Last To Say :"Good Bye...Bye Bye!!"

My WORDS To -Y-

2008-08-20T09:45:00.000-07:00

Once I Let You Go, I Can't Get You back.
So I Tied You To My Heart, I Thought I'll Never Loose You.
But I'm Wrong.

You Said You Couldn't Stand To See My Heart Broken,
So You Promised That You Won't Ever Hurt Me,
You Sworn That You Will Never Say "Break Up" Words To Me,
But When You Say It, Hurt Me, Broke It,
Did You Really Swear? Did You Keep Your Promise?
Did You Close Your Eye?

Love Is Giving Someone The Ability To Hurt You,
But Trusting Them That They Won't,
I Did...But......What Had Happen??

Do You Still Remember This Song?
Because Of You, I'm Loving This Song Very Much,
There Would Be Smile On My Face When I Listen To This Song Before,
But Not Now, It's Different.
____________________________________________________________________

-Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis-

You Know?
When I was in NS, I sang this song every night before i close my eye.
I was really miss you all the time when I was in NS that time.
Every night I sure got called you when i was at camp.
After that sure i got SMS you secretly with the blanket covered the whole body of me before I rest myself.
Ask...how are you? Got naughty? Got study? Got drink water? Got eat your lunch when I can't have it with you? Worry of you will falling sick, don't want the feeling of lonely will go to you. Scare of you got bully.
Even when I training, exercising, eating, being with friends...the music was playing repeat, repeat and repeat in my heart. Never the music of this song stop even a second.

Every time when I open my eye, I hope is the day of I can back home.
The happiest thing when I was in NS, was......
The moment when I closed my eye.
Because I can only "see" you and "being" with you in my dream.
With the playing of this song in my heart.

My FIRST POST

2008-08-20T09:12:00.000-07:00

Actually I wanna get my blog earlier, just got some big and small problems came to me last time...make me just got to keep on stop and stop and STOP create my BLOG!!
Those problems like school stuff, studies, sports and My Past Loved!!
Maybe those i post now are those i wanna post early before.
But i just didn't do so......no time, no mood.

All my posts are my feeling...may won't come out from my mouth...only u will know from here...
~My Heart's Word~